Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Twerp Reconditioning

Good morning! Wow, I always forget how much easier it is taking care of two kids instead of three. Consider that, and the fact that their leader is the one that is away and all of a sudden they are like fish out of water. Seriously, it comes down to the simplest things. We have completely disrupted their systems of parental abuse. They are like putty in our hands.

You may think that I am overstating the impact for dramatic effect but I assure you no such motive exists. It is truly the dawn of a new day.

It comes down to the smallest of things. Take getting dressed in the morning for example. On a typical morning, as soon as I get out of the shower, the command comes down from high authority (me) "It is time to get dressed." On a normal day, they just sit there. You see, they are waiting for their leader to move. Until Sydney does something, nothing can be expected of them. This is not because Sydney is being difficult. Rather it is just because she is usually the last awake and the most tired. It takes some time to get her engine started and for her to become aware of surroundings. I get that. In fact, I ask twice before I turn on mean Daddy voice. After a delay, she is finally doing as I asked. Reality sets in. Sydney gets up and starts getting dressed. Like zombies, Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dum follow her. It is annoying. It is as if they need Sydney's blessing before they do anything we ask.

So what changed in one simple day?

Well, yesterday morning began as usual. Sure enough, as I stepped out of the shower I made the announcement. I kid you not, they looked straight at each other as though completely baffled. They had no clue what to do. It was as if I asked them to solve a calculus problem. They clearly had no idea what to do. All of a sudden, with looks of shock and a complete lack of understanding they got up and began to put on their clothes. They kept looking at each other as if searching for answers.

I turned around and went back into the bathroom where I don't think I could have laughed harder. Throughout the day, this episode was replayed on several occasions. It seemed as though every time I asked them to start doing something they actually did it. The funny thing was that they looked as though they were being controlled by remote control. They had no idea what they were doing or why they were doing it.

The transformation is happening! (Evil Laugh)

Purpose is suddenly flowing through their veins they just don't know what it is.

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