At 4:00 AM this morning it began.
You may remember that about 6 months ago I started Insanity, a workout program designed to get you in great shape over a period of 60 days. I completed the program and, lo and behold, lost 30 pounds in the process. It was quite a success. The only problem was that a week later I broke my big toe and was benched for several months until my foot was able to absorb the shock of working out again. I don't know whether it was the benching of myself or the fact that I crammed by gullet full of Mexican food and ice cream but, it was not long before I put 10 to 15 pounds back on. The good news, though, is that my toe has recovered and I am now able to work out and strive to return back to my musculous svelte self.
Lynley, too, has decided to join me in an effort to achieve her ultimate sexiness. (Although, how could anyone be any sexier really?) Regardless, this morning we began our quest. I must say that this time I started off much better. I was able to complete the warm up on my first day without pausing which for me is quite a feat. For anyone that has done Insanity, you know what I mean. For Lynley it was a bit more difficult. However, I must give her credit where credit is due. She was able to do much more than I had done the first time I had ever attempted Insanity. She didn't even pass out. You may laugh, but it happens.
The good news is that we both felt the great surge of adrenalin after completing our morning workout. Lynley went on to do some work and then mixed in some chores. She was smart she stayed on her feet.
I, on the other hand, grabbed my laptop and plopped down on the couch. Sounds relaxing, right? The problem is that after sitting here for a couple of hours, I can't get off the couch. It seems my legs and back no longer function. I am intensely stiff and every time I move I feel pure unadulterated pain.
Worse yet, as Lynley has walked by me this morning complaining about how sore she was, I just made fun of her. I told her to suck it up.
Now, I still have to make my way upstairs, clothe the kiddos, take a shower, and make breakfast and do it all without her recognizing that I am the supreme wuss of the Dungan workout regime.
I can't even get off the stupid couch.
I know that when I move and crawl my way upstairs that there is no way that I will be able to do so without looking like a 100 year old (no offense meant to you agile 100 year olds). She is going to find out that I am actually sorer than her and I can guarantee that there will be no end to the abuse and the humiliation. There is no way that I can fake it - and that is if I can even make my way up the upstairs successfully.
Once again, my mouth has gotten me into more trouble.
I don't think there is enough purpose in the world to get me out of this one.