Monday, October 19, 2009

Big fat liar

Ahhh, good morning. So, you have not heard from me in awhile. I am happy to report that everything is going well. It was been a great few days if not just tremendously busy. As you might expect, with three kiddos, we keep pretty our hands pretty full simply going from one activity to another. I have come to a realization in life though - and, it isn't a very nice one.

My daughter is a big fat liar.

Wow, there you go. I let it all out on the table for everyone to see. You would think that after all of my kiddo practice I would have mastered this little transgression. Certainly, after earning our stripes on a child with cancer and then following that with a son (presumably of my stock) that we must have faced nearly everything. We must have mastered most toddler rearing skills.

Well, I am sorry to say, we have failed.

It is true. Ainsley is a big fat liar.

To be honest, we never really faced this level of challenge with the other two. Sydney lied but it was always completely obvious. She never had the skills to be a good liar. It just wasn't in her. Don't get me wrong. She tried and probably would have become very good at it had she stuck to it but, as is usual with my eldest offspring, she could not master it immediately, become frustrated with it, and moved on to something more promising. That is just her. She still lies but she really isn't very good at it.

Graham on the other hand falls into a different category. I have actually read up on this. 96% of all children lie regularly. There are obviously 4% that do not. That is where Graham falls. It just does not exist in him. Oh sure, we get the occasional lie out of him but in never sticks to fruition. He can't stand the feeling and eventually trying to hold it all in will eventually break the boy. He is too honest and kind. That is just Graham. He doesn't have the heart for lying.

Ainsley, well, like Graham, falls into a category all her own. Unfortunately, it is on the opposite side of the spectrum. She would lie to you just as soon as look at you. I am not kidding. Lynley did the research on this one. Did you know that, on average, a four year old lies about once every two hours. Ainsley, on the other hand, tells the truth about once every two hours.

Need an example?

Yesterday, I was with Sydney at a birthday party when I received this text from Lynley after she put Ainsley down for a nap:
Lynley: "LOL, sleep well Ainsley. Want to give you lots of cuddles. What's that noise?
Ainsley: "My candy."
Lynley: Where? Oh, it is in your underwear. How'd that get there?
Ainsley: Not me.
Lynley: Then, who?
Ainsley: A ghost.
What can I say? That is my dear sainted Ainsley. I don't really have an answer. It isn't shocking to me anymore. In fact, behind closed doors, it is fun to laugh with Lynley about her last escapade. It just is what it is.

You have heard this before but I will say it again. Ainsley is going to be my greatest challenge.

I am amazed that all of these children are related. They have all been brought up the same way and, for the most part, they have always been treated roughly the same. It just blows me away. I just don't understand how they could be so entirely different. I guess I should be happy that they do have one thing in common. They are all very predictable. If Sydney lies, we will be able to see right through it. Graham either won't lie or, if he does, is likely to self destruct. Ainsley, well, we are just lucky that she is perfectly predictable. At this stage in her life it is more likely that she is telling a lie than the truth.

It is not a perfect system but those are my purpii.

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